Friday, 14 December 2012

He is my son in-law but i want him - please help

            This is a story from a very depressed woman who needs an advice.

I am 40 years old this year, I am a beautiful, intelligent but lonely woman. I was 17years old when I got admission into the university, and  in my second year, I met a guy, we dated for about 4months and I got pregnant, when I got pregnant, I told my boyfriend and he denied impregnating me, he said we had only dated for 4months and that I was trying to trap him down with pregnancy which he was not ready for. With the support of my parents, I kept the pregnancy and had my baby girl, my daughter grew up into a beautiful woman.

The whole problem started when my daughter was 22 years old daughter. One day she called me to say she is bringing her fiancé home in 2days time, that he had proposed to marry her and she accepted. I was so happy to see my daughter achieve what I couldn’t achieve all though my youthful age.

When my daughter and her fiancé came home two days later, I was so dumb founded. My daughter came home with this cute, tall, dark and lovable guy, when he smiled, I almost melted. Immediately my heart loved him and I knew there was problem. I took them both inside and we got talking, they said they’ve made arrangements for the wedding to come up in 2weeks time. And I was like, why the rush, and they told me my daughter was already pregnant and they just needed to do everything fast.

After my daughter and her fiancé left, I kept thinking about this guy, what it will be like having him all to myself but then I also thought about my daughters feelings and how its going to hurt her if I make any crazy move at the guy and I don’t ever want to hurt my daughter for any reason so i thought the only way I was going to kill that feeling was to avoid seeing the guy.

After the wedding, I kept a very far distance from my daughter and her husband, I only go to see her when its was necessary and when the husband isn’t around. And we continued like that until 8months later when I got a call from my son-inlaw telling me my daughter was in labour and he was taking her to the hospital. Immediately  I left all I was doing and starting driving down to the hospital.  While I was driving I started wondering what it will be like going to live in my daughter’s house for the Omugwo thing. Seeing her husband everyday and living with him in the same house. I was just praying in my heart that nothing will go wrong between us and then I got to the hospital and met him(my inlaw) sitting down, asked him how the labour started and he got talking. While we were there waiting, the doctor came out and gave us the worse news of my life that my daughter is dead, that she lost a lot of blood but she gave birth to a baby girl and the baby is alive. O’ MY  GOD. It was the worse moment I ever had. I cried and cried my heart out.

Its been like 1 year and 9 months since my daughter died and I have been living with my son-inlaw ever since to be able to take care of my little grand daughter . the feelings I have for my son-inlaw just keeps increasing as the day goes by but I don’t know how to start to let him know how am feeling. Ever since my daughter died he has neva been with another woman.

Now my concern is if another woman comes into this house, she might not be able to take care of my grand daughter the way I will.  

That’s why am asking this question should I tell my son-inlaw about  how I feel or let him move on with his life and bring in another woman who might maltreat my daughter’s child?

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